Wedding season is approaching: dresses are being bought, caterers hired and all weekends for the foreseeable future are being booked up. For anyone who's single and wishes they weren't, spring can be an uniquely depressing and busy time of year.

Three cheers for Tracey Emin, then, who's on hand to remind us that it could be worse: the artist has recently revealed that she is, in fact, married to a stone.

Yes, Emin, most famous for My Bed, a piece of art consisting of her own messy bed, has announced that she married an ancient rock last summer. She told The Art Newspaper that: 'It just means that at the moment I am not alone.

'Somewhere on a hill facing the sea, there is a very beautiful ancient stone, and it’s not going anywhere. It will be there, waiting for me.'

Emin says that she wore her father’s white funeral shroud during the wedding ceremony and, in a separate interview, revealed that the stone lives close by, having presumably moved it from the hill.

'It's in my garden, it's very nice and very impressive and I like it a lot.'

Singletons: to your local park at once.

Image: GETTY