President Barack Obama addressed many things during his final press conference today—the Chelsea Manning commutation, what worries him about American democracy, and all things Russia among them. But it was the last question, about how he's talked to his daughters about the meaning of this election, that had the most resonance.
It started with some bragging ("Man, my daughters are something. And they just surprise and enchant and impress me more and more every single day as they grow up"), touched on their political ambitions, and then got real.
Malia and Sasha are the reason Obama is hopeful for the future. "They do not—they don't mope," he said. "What makes me proudest about them is that they also don't get cynical about it [democracy]. They have not assumed because their side didn't win or because some of the values that they care about don't seem as if they were vindicated that automatically America has somehow rejected them or rejected their values. I don't think they feel that way."
"I think they have—in part through osmosis, in part through dinnertime conversation–appreciated the fact this is a big, complicated country, and democracy's messy," he continued. "It doesn't always work the way you might want. It doesn't guarantee certain outcomes. But if you're engaged and you're involved, then there are a lot more good people than bad in this country. And there's a core decency to this country. And that they got to be a part of lifting that up. And I expect they will be. And in that sense they are representative of this generation that makes me really optimistic." He then launched in an incredible pep talk about why we will be okay. It has everything to do with us and nothing to do with President-elect Donald Trump.
The entire response is worth reading:
You know, every parent brags on their daughters or their sons. You know, if your mom and dad don't brag on you, you know, you've got problems. But, man, my daughters are something. And they just surprise and enchant and impress me more and more every single day as they grow up.
And so these days when we talk, we talk as—as parent to child but also we learn from them. And I think it was really interesting to see how Malia and Sasha reacted. They were disappointed. They paid attention to what their mom said during the campaign and believed it because it's consistent with what we've tried to teach them in our household and what I've tried to model as a father with their mom and what we've asked them to expect from future boyfriends or spouses. But what we've also tried to teach them is resilience and we've tried to teach them hope, and that the only thing that is the end of the world is the end of the world.
And so, you get knocked down, you get up, brush yourself off, and you get back to work. And that tended to be their attitude. I think neither of them intend to pursue a future of politics. And in that, too, I think their mother's influence shows. But both of them have grown up in an environment where I think they could not but help be patriotic. To love this country deeply, to see that it's flawed but see that they have responsibilities to fix it. And that they need to be active citizens, and they have to be in a position to talk to their friends and their teachers and their future co-workers in ways that try to shed some light as opposed to just generate a lot of sound and fury. And I expect that's what they're going to do. They do not—they don't mope. And what I really am proud of them—but what makes me proudest about them is that they also don't get cynical about it. They have not assumed because their side didn't win or because some of the values that they care about don't seem as if they were vindicated that automatically America has somehow rejected them or rejected their values. I don't think they feel that way.
I think they have—in part through osmosis, in part through dinner time conversation–appreciated the fact this is a big, complicated country, and democracy's messy. It doesn't always work the way you might want. It doesn't guarantee certain outcomes. But if you're engaged and you're involved, then there are a lot more good people than bad in this country. And there's a core decency to this country. And that they got to be a part of lifting that up. And I expect they will be. And in that sense they are representative of this generation that makes me really optimistic. I've been asked—I had—I've had some off-the-record conversations with journalist where they've said, you seem like you're okay, but really, really, what are you thinking? I've said, no, I—what I'm saying really is what I think.
I believe in this country. I believe in the American people. I believe that people are more good than bad. I believe tragic things happen. I think there's evil in the world, but I think that at the end of the day if we work hard and if we're true to those things in us that feel true and feel right, that the world gets a little better each time. That's what this presidency has tried to be about. And I see that in the young people I've worked with. I couldn't be prouder of them and so this is not just a matter of No Drama Obama. This is what I really believe. It is true that behind closed doors I curse more than I do publicly and sometimes I get mad and frustrated like everybody else does. But at my core, I think we're going to be okay. We just have to fight for it. We have to work for it and not take it for granted. And I know that you will help us do it. Thank you, press corps, and good luck!
Alyssa Bailey is the senior news and strategy editor at ELLE.com, where she oversees coverage of celebrities and royals (particularly Meghan Markle and Kate Middleton). She previously held positions at InStyle and Cosmopolitan. When she's not working, she loves running around Central Park, making people take #ootd pics of her, and exploring New York City.
