Gwyneth Paltrow has imparted her unsolicited advice on many things – vagina steaming to ex-purging bra burning. Most recently she gave us some truly suspiciously named supplements to try.
And now she's decided to give us some handy instructions for embarking on your first anal sex journey, because obviously.
In the Sex Issue of Goop, Paltrow's lifestyle site, readers are told that if "anal turns you on, you are definitely not alone".
"First it was shocking, then it was having a cultural moment, now it's practically standard in the modern bedroom repertoire—or so a quick scan of any media, from porn to HBO, will tell you,' says Goop. "But the reality about anal is not, actually, that everyone's doing it."
The piece then offers Q&A-based advice from research psychoanalyst and author Paul Joannides, who has published a book on sexuality called The Guide To Getting It On!
It explains that the 80s made anal sex a thing for hetero couples. Apparently, by 2005, 'porn had totally blurred the distinction between a woman's anus and vagina.'
Oh my.
He goes onto explain the health risks of anal sex and how to modify the anal sex seen in porn.
Paul explains: 'The two sets of sphincter muscles that nature placed around the opening of the anus are there for one thing: to help humans to maintain their dignity when in crowded spaces (to keep poop from dropping out)' - using this as his reason for why we might need to adjust our angles and make sure we take a lot of time to learn just how to relax these muscles.
He also tells us how to make sure your anal experience is a positive one - like, don't get drunk or stoned - and what should we be telling our children about anal.
So there we have the completely unprompted Gwyneth Paltrow guide to anal sex. You're welcome.
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