10 Photos That Prove Nobody Looks More Glamorous on a Boat Than Amal Clooney

All the famous people at the Venice Film Festival arrive via boat, but only one of them can navigate her lilac Atelier Versace—with a train, no less—so successfully. Couldn't imagine who we could be talking about.

Ladies first.

Here, she's in the Maldives trying to free deposed democratic leader Mohamed Nasheed. (After Clooney went to Washington to lobby for him, Nasheed was eventually allowed to travel to the U.K. for an operation.) 

And even if it didn't, they'd look much clamp-ier trying to keep a hand on it.

Or a commemorative handkerchief or dinner plate or other merchandise in honor of their 2014 wedding, that will have been a massive missed opportunity. (I am available for other branding ideas, call me, Amal.) 

"Oh, I'm just casually flipping my hair to look in the direction of my screaming fans, even though they're in every direction." 

Probably for a fine jewelry company with a tagline like "There's always time for romance" or something, blah blah.

In this handoff, you can definitely tell George meant it when he spent, like, 700 words gushing about how he knew Amal was the one, even though, the first time they met, his parents were there, which would normally be a huge romance-block.

(This is addressed to Amal, because she would clearly be the one expertly doing the boat chase and eluding the bad guys, while George looks cute being worried and maybe launching a torpedo at them, if we're lucky.) 

What is this? A Renaissance painting? (That pyramidal composition, yo.) How are Amal and George still so photogenic and perfectly framed when their companions are literally CINDY FREAKIN' CRAWFORD AND RANDE GERBER?