Woman Writes Formal Rejection Letter To A Man's NSFW Picture And It's Friggin' Great

A woman has taken to Twitter to formally decline a man's sexually explicit image and offers some advice on how he can go forward in his dating life if he ever hopes to bag a girlfriend

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Woman clapping | ELLE UK
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If you've ever been on a dating app such as Tinder or Bumble, you might be accustomed to an offensive phallic image, commonly referred to as a 'd*ck pic'.

'Why yes potential knight in shining armour, I'd love to see a picture of your nether regions before knowing where you're from, your hobbies and future aspirations. Nothing gets me going like a picture of your penis.'

If there are any men reading this, let me be yet another woman in the long line of ladies who want to tell you that nobody – maybe not even your doctor – wants to see that before they've even seen your face.

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Put it away like a normal person.

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As this response continues to fall on deaf ears for some, one woman has taken it into her own hands to pen a rejection letter to NSFW images, worthy of a 'bow down' moment, courtesy of Beyoncé.

In the Hogworts-style acceptance letter, the Twitter user writes:

'Thank you for the unexpected and unsolicited submission of your penis portrait for our consideration. We regret to inform you that it has failed to pass our most basic standards of quality control at this time.'

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She adds: 'The A4 report, provided via postal service, will include a personalised booklet that cover the following:

  • Why genitals are not an acceptable conversation opener (a step by step guide to saying hello)
  • How to appear as though you weren't raised by wolves
  • Better ways to deal with your sexual frustration
  • How to dress your penis for social media (a rough guide to pants)
  • AND
  • Penis reading: a new form of palmistry that may help you unlock the key to your future.'

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'We trust this exciting offer is acceptable and look forward to working with you in the near future,' the letter ends.

The post first appeared courtesy of its author Sarah-Louise in June but is now being circulated around the internet because clearly, some guys haven't got the memo that flirting does not equate to naked images.

Men, you have been warned.

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