Hen party insanity

Say no to forced fun

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If I asked you to describe your perfect weekend, would any of the following activities get a shout out? Line dancing, making a music video, salsa lesson, knicker embroidery? No, me neither. So why, oh why, have they all somehow become credible hen party pursuits? 

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Let’s all agree now that organised fun is painful at the best of times. It’s one thing spending the weekend with a random group of women you hardly know but it’s another entirely when you have to do so in Edwardian fancy dress on a climbing wall in the Yorkshire dales.

Having organised two hen do’s myself, I am sympathetic to the many stipulations involved. You have to please the bride as well as 15 women you don’t know from Adam while curating a fun, unique weekend that doesn’t cost the earth. It’s a tough gig. But I do not understand why people insist on planning such deranged activities as garter making. Who wants to spend their Saturday afternoon making a garter, for god’s sake?

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The problem is that we have lost sight of the point. A hen is meant to be a fun way to celebrate your friend’s upcoming wedding while giving some members of the wedding party a chance to get to know each other a bit better. Let me remind all sisters, besties and maids of honour out there that all of this can be achieved over a nice dinner and a glass of wine. Learning how to make sushi or taking a Zumba class under duress does little to help the process along.

At risk of sounding too bah humbug about the whole thing, I will concede that a certain amount of creative planning is required to break the ice in some situations. But I maintain that a picnic in the park or night out dancing can do the trick. You might think you’re being clever sending a group of grown women zorbing down an English hillside but you’re wrong. If I want to zorb, I’ll do it on my own time, thank you.

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