Something For The Weekend 1-4 May

FOOD: Street Feast London

You’ll know that street food is the ONLY way to eat nowadays – that is, unless you’ve been living in a non-foodie-populated bunker (where you’re probably still using plates. And cutlery. And tables. For shame). And so, good news: the daddy of all food festivals is back for its summer residency, bringing artisan burgers, posh pad thai and all manner of sugar-based goodness to the streets of London. Whether you head to Dalston Yard or the Lewisham Model Market outpost, Rola Wala’s twistedly fantastic open Indian wraps and Fundi Pizza’s wood-fired marvels are worth the journey alone. Plus, where else can you perfect the art of eating while standing up, balancing a pint of craft beer AND dancing to the very finest in electro beats? Vital life skill, right there.

Every Friday and Saturday from 1 May

MUSIC: Land of Kings festival, Dalston

So there’s cutting-edge electro, then there’s bleeding-edge, blimey-no-really-you’re-going-to-hurt-yourself electro. And this multi-venue, day-long festival around Dalston falls firmly into the latter camp. Among the ‘pff, we’re too cool to be superstar’ DJs taking over the district’s creative spaces are Moxie, Waze & Odyssey and clubland party animals The 2 Bears (miss at your peril). What’s that? You want live music? Portico, Tom Vek and Nathan Fake will all be plying their suitably cool sounds around E8, before Bugged Out takes over Oval Space to keep the festivities rolling till 6am. SIX in the morning, you say? Challenge accepted.

£25, Sunday 3 May 12pm-6am, various venues. landofkings.co.uk

EVENT: Canalway Cavalcade, Little Venice

After something a little more laid-back for your bank holiday? It doesn’t come more c-h-i-l-l than a day messing around on the river. And handily, there’s a whole lot of that goIng on down at little Venice, where over 100 canalboats all dressed to the nines come together for this annual pageant. Boating fun includes an illuminated procession, while real ale tents and curiosity stalls keep us landlubbers happy. Oh, and there’s Morris dancing. Because no bank holiday is complete without some ruddy good Morris dancing.

Free, 2-4 May, Little Venice, Grand Union Canal, London E9 2PB

ART: The Alice Look

You’re late! You’re late! For a very important date! Nope, not for a tea party (plenty of time for that later), but for this new exhibition telling how Alice fell down a rabbit hole and straight into fashion history. And she really is an arbiter of style. Just think about it: Alice boots, Alice bands… and there’s no denying that pinafore dress is still a good look. Bringing together garments, artworks and modern interpretations by the likes of Annie Leibovitz and Gwen Stefani, to miss this you’d have to be as mad as a…

Free From 2 May V&A Museum of Childhood, Cambridge Heath Road, London E2 9PA

SHOPPING: Shop It! pop-up

When Fashion East founder Lulu Kennedy edits the new crop of design talent, and then opens a pop-up shop to sell their current-season samples and archive pieces at ridiculously reduced prices, we don’t just sit up and pay attention. We run there and all-out scrap you for that primary colour Louise Gray knit, £50 (nb. this actually happened). With steal-at-the-price pieces from her own Lulu & Co line as well as future classics by the likes of Christopher Shannon and LF Markey, we suggest you get down there now. With your boxing gloves.

Until 3 May, Old Street Tube Station, London EC1Y 1EB

EVENT: London Coffee Festival

Do you: ever order a double shot, low fat, half foam latte? Know your Ethiopian yiracheffe from your Italian roast? Disown friends who deign to give you – whisper it – Nescafé? If your answer to any of these questions is yes, then come, be among your people. In fact, come if you just like a good cup of joe, good food, or even an espresso martini. For they are all to be found in abundance at this celebration of all things caffeinated, taking over Brick Lane’s Old Truman Brewery. There will be demos, tastings, DJs, food and even a master barista competition. Just don’t mention that one time you accidentally drank a green tea, OK?

£11.50, 30 Apr-3 May

FILM: Far From The Madding Crowd

So you’ve filled your weekend with coffee and 6am partying (to blame? Who, us?) but here’s the perfect way to unwind and immerse yourself in some literature with this new adaptation of the Thomas Hardy classic. Carey Mulligan stars as Bathsheba (our new baby name, incidentally), a Victorian beauty pursued by a (hot) sheep farmer, a (slightly less hot) soldier and a delusional older neighbour (not supposed to be hot, but played by Michael Sheen, so just fine by us). Chased by three suitors, eh? Hate it when that happens.

In cinemas 1 May

ART: Marlene Dumas: The Image As Burden

In today’s insta-selfie-facebook-gram times, it’s easy to forget the power of a portrait not taken from the end of a stick – or involving Kim Kardashian’s derrière, come to think of it. That why you NEED get to Tate Modern while you can still see this emotionally charged retrospective of the finest figurative portrait artist of modern times. Dumas’ subjects include everyone from Amy Winehouse, Princess Diana and Naomi Campbell to, er, Jesus. And it’s guaranteed you’ll see each one of them in a new, wholly unexpected light.

£16, until 3 May Tate Modern, Bankside, London SE1 9TG

DRINK: Brooklyn Brewery Mash Tour

Come on, let’s do the mash. No, not the monster mash. This is way more fun – it involves beer! Brooklyn Brewery Mash Tour is the largest international travelling food, beer and arts festival, and is pitching up in venues around London this bank holiday. As well as lots and LOTS of craft beers, you can expect exclusive food tastings, talks, film screenings and even an ‘animation block party’. Though, to be fair, you had us at craft beer.

Until 3 May, various locations and prices. For full details and tickets, see brooklynbrewerymash.com/london