Writtn by: Ruthie Friedlander

The desire to possess something can be so overwhelming it can keep you from thinking or doing anything else. Find that piece that screams your name and suddenly everything around you blurs. That thing you want – now! – has power and momentum; it has the ability to give you a self-confidence that nothing else could bring.   

We’ve all had that feeling when you see something and you just have to have it. You can’t sleep until you know where it’s from, how to get it, the exact moment when it can be yours. 

Working in fashion, I know this feeling well. In meetings at fine jewellery houses I have the opportunity to try on pieces that are sometimes worth hundreds of thousands of pounds, and I know the feeling that gives you deep down in your stomach.

At first I thought it was excitement, even nervousness, but I soon realised that what I felt so strongly when I was wearing something with that much weight, that much beauty, was in fact a sense of importance, empowerment. 

While watching Beyoncé perform at a recent concert, I caught sight of something truly stunning. Despite the massive crowd, lights, and unimaginably angelic voice, what stood out for me was the delicate floral diamond necklace she was wearing – an interesting juxtaposition against her glittery, barely-there booty shorts. 

‘Look at that body,’ my friend said in awe.

‘Look at that necklace,’ was all I could think.

So I did what I always do when I see a celebrity wearing something I love. I opened Google and searched furiously.

Mid-concert I emailed stylists I knew who worked with the singer. I went on fan sites. I scrolled back through three-months worth of photos on her Instagram account to see if she had tagged it at an earlier point. I had to know where this necklace was from. I had to know if I could get it. 

While I was searching, I fell in love with other pieces she had worn: a huge canary diamond ring; a pair of teardrop sapphire earrings; the most insane cuff I have ever seen. But no necklace.

Finally, after reaching over the seat in front of me to snap a closer photo of my prize (and nearly falling over in the process), I realised I had gone mad and sat back down to enjoy the rest of the performance. 

But the way I had been gripped so intensely by the need to find this one special piece made me think: was I being driven by some materialistic sensibility or the innate understanding of how I knew I’d feel wearing it that led me to become so crazed? 

There’s something that happens when you find that one piece – whether it’s the perfect necklace, bracelet, or even dress – that offers you a sense of confidence you simply can’t find elsewhere. And if you’ve felt that, you know it’s not just because you love the way you look in it.

Perhaps it’s the feeling of its weight on your neck, or knowing that what you are wearing is special to you. Not just because you have chosen it for its unique beauty, but also because that piece makes you stand taller, speak more confidently – or in Beyoncé’s case sing louder and dance with even more conviction. All you have to do is watch one of her many diamond-clad music videos to see the power that jewels can  have; the way they can seem make a woman feel and move so differently.

It wasn’t just her voice that was so captivating for me that evening. It was the way she held her body, the way she conducted herself in front of a stadium of 18,000 people. And as a woman, I know that you can only move that way when you have the sense of confidence that you gain by feeling beautiful. 

I never did find that necklace, but I do have my own special pieces of jewellery, however humble in comparison they may be. And before every meeting, I casually roll the diamond bands I regularly wear on my right hand and push the backings on my studs. 

It’s a habit I picked up from watching my own mother play with her fine jewellery – one that I like to imagine my future daughters might pick up on as well. It’s not a nervous habit. This act connects me to the talismans I depend on for confidence, to feel empowered and fearless. And it’s a feeling I know I could only achieve with jewellery.

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