With two weeks to go until Prince Harry and Meghan Markle say their I do’s at St. George’s Chapel on May 19, there’s still plenty of time to stock up on the supplies you’ll need to celebrate. You may not be able to snag an exact replica of Markle’s dress—or even figure out what, remotely, her gown will look like—but as far as royal wedding-themed baubles, doodads, and all-important thingamajigs go, the Internet more than delivers. To horrendously paraphrase Queen Victoria: we are (very) amused.
[asset removed due to syndication rights]For a start, how can you best communicate your royal fandom to other drivers when you’re stuck in traffic? Fortunately, WiperWaggers are here for you. These novelty decals come to life with the movement of the rear windshield wiper. Among the U.K. company’s designs, pets are reliably popular—especially particular breeds of dog, be it a border collie or a husky—as are topical tie-ins like the “Waving Queen,” made in honor of Elizabeth II’s Diamond Jubilee, and the “Raving Waving Raging Kim.” (Of the latter, company spokesman Angus Small explained, “It's basically Kim Jong-un waving a North Korean flag and telling everybody to stay back from the car, because he's not in a good mood.”) The “Harry & Megs” WiperWagger depicts the couple in a decidedly good mood, waving to the driver pulled up behind them, and features a speech bubble with interchangeable messages like “It’s the 19th May at Windsor!” Sales of the royal wedding WiperWaggers have been split roughly in half, with 50% within the U.K. and 50% to other English-speaking countries, mainly to the U.S. and Australia. “Even before we had got the packaging sorted out, someone from the States was our first sale,” Small said.
[asset removed due to syndication rights]Unsurprisingly, Americans have also gotten into the royal-wedding memento game. Allison Andrews of the Austin-based Etsy shop WittyChicken looks to pop culture to inform her playful laminated paper earrings, the designs of which (to name just a few) pay homage to Macaulay Culkin in Home Alone, Doritos, Drake, the Philadelphia Eagles, and axe murderer Lizzie Borden. An intentionally mismatched pair of Meghan and Harry portrait earrings have recently become Andrews’ bestseller. “I’m actually pretty shocked at how well they have been doing,” she said. The transatlantic wedding buzz has also made other earring-ified members of the royal family—Will, Kate, Queen Elizabeth (as a young woman, at her present age, or paired with one of her corgis)—into strong performers. Andrews’ customer base is primarily American, but she’s also sent Harry and Megs earrings to Australia and Canada, not to mention a recent purchase from Dubai. She expects they’ll make great party favors.
“Most people buy more than one pair,” Andrews said. “I've even had someone buy 20 at a time.”
Shirley Lee channeled her lifelong fondness for sewing into launching her History Wearz shop on Etsy two years ago. The New Jersey resident designs clothing for 18-inch dolls, inspired by history and current events. Thanks to the new Beauty and the Beast movie, 2017’s biggest seller was Belle’s yellow gown—Lee made more than 100 matching sets of dresses for dolls and little girls. When she saw Prince Harry and Meghan Markle’s engagement interview, she knew she was witnessing something special. “I just was so touched by the love they both expressed, and also, my marketing bell went off. I was saying, ‘Aww,’ and then, ‘Cha-ching!’” And so Lee set about making her own version of Meghan Markle and Prince Harry’s wedding ensembles, which she’s since shipped as far away as Japan.
[asset removed due to syndication rights]For Harry, she took an “educated guess” and dressed him in his Capital General Royal Marines uniform, but all bets are off as to what Meghan’s gown could look like. Lee opted for a single, A-line style—for now. “I'm going to be glued to the TV,” she says of the wedding. “I’ll have my DVR on.” With her sewing machine and glue gun at the ready, Lee hopes to have her doll-sized version of dress out by Monday the 21st, two days after the Saturday nuptials. And in the future, she plans to offer a line of Markle’s most “iconic” outfits, all of which will be interchangeable.
Other Harry and Meghan souvenirs are decidedly R-rated (R, here, does not stand for Royal). Crown Jewels first made “commemorative love sheaths” for William and Kate's 2011 wedding, and now they’ve bestowed the same honor upon the (rumored) future Duke and Duchess of Sussex. The British purveyor of “heirloom prophylactics” sells a set of four for £10 ($14). They are perhaps the world’s only condoms that come with a signed “Certificate of Authenticity,” inside a box that plays “God Save the Queen” and “The Star-Spangled Banner” when opened. They’ve sold 6,500 to date of their limited run of 10,000 royal wedding packs, per company spokesperson Hugh Pomfret. “Most of our customers are from former colonies,” Pomfret wrote in an email. “They're very popular in Australia, New Zealand, and America. In fact, we just sold 25 packs to very nice lady in Ohio!” The condoms have also, intriguingly, proven to be popular in Russia.
[asset removed due to syndication rights]“The overwhelming majority of royal souvenirs are very uninspiring,” he said. “What, after all, do all those traditional mugs, plates and tea spoons have to do with a royal wedding? Our luxurious condoms, on the other hand, are both memorable and romantic.”
Speaking of traditional, Buckingham Palace has commissioned a line of official commemorative china in honor of the royal wedding, because of course they have. The baby-blue dishware is decorated with the initials “H” and “M” in a delicate gold script. Lucy Bryant, a graphic designer and artist in London, sells a commemorative plate of her own design in her ModernChintz Etsy shop. It certainly looks the part, with stately purple trim, an inscription bearing the royal wedding date, and side-by-side inset portraits of Meghan and Har—wait, hold on. That face doesn’t belong to the groom, but to another mega-famous British ginger: Ed Sheeran. “I was inspired by a mug that I bought when William and Kate got married. It actually had a picture of Harry on it by mistake,” Bryant explained. “I'm still getting messages every day from people saying, ‘Did you know that this isn't Harry? Did you know that's Ed Sheeran?’ Sometimes I play along as well, because I think people are delighted to think it is a mistake.” She plans on sending the singer-songwriter one as a gift.
“I'd say maybe 80% of the sales have been from the US because you guys are absolutely mad for the Royal Family,” Bryant said of her Prince Ed plates. “You love it.”
[asset removed due to syndication rights]Why are we so excited about Harry and Megs’ union? Although Harry’s not the heir to the throne, meaning his wedding won’t quite match the pomp and circumstance of future king William’s, Princess Diana’s younger son is nevertheless a very popular figure at home (where he serves in the armed forces) and abroad. “He's also been a bit of a ... not a bad boy, but he's a bit of a lad,” Small said. “Now they're seeing him settling down and it seems to be a really good match.” In addition to being an accomplished actress, Markle, like her fiancé, is known for her charity work. For many, it’s especially exhilarating that an American is poised to join the royalest of royal families—and at that, a family that also happens to be super, duper white. “It's historical in a sense: Meghan Markle is a biracial person,” Andrews said. “People are really excited about that. It kind of shows how far we've come as a planet.”
“It's a funny old time over here, because we have so many things going on, like the potential Brexit from Europe, so to an extent that there is a desire to have some sort of happy, uncontroversial news, I think this wedding has fit in really well,” Small said. “There will be, I assume, lots of horses and carriages and castles and all that.”
Or as Lee suggested, “In the world we live in today, we all want to have a little fun.”
