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THE MAIN EVENT: Pride Parade
It’s the most important party of the year and 2019’s Pride looks set to be a scorcher, in all of the ways (go on, sunshine!). Saturday’s fierce, fabulous, glit-ter-reee parade celebrating the LGBTQ+ community kicks off at Portland Place, before heading along Regent Street and down to Whitehall. This year’s line-up at the Trafalgar Square stage includes the iconic Billy Porter, Chezza’n’Kimberley-alikes Gals Aloud, Pride’s Got Talent, and former RuPaul’s Drag Race contestants William, Soju and Scarlet Envy. All together now: YAAAAS Queen!
6 Jul; free
THE WILD ONE: Duckie: Gay Shame
Now, when event is billed as being aimed at ‘ambitionless chain-smokers, despondent dykes, gay forty-somethings in shorts, kweer casualties, perverts on sick leave, wage slaves with spare change and regrettable ravers who can’t resist revelling in a railway arch’, you know you’re in not in for an average night. And when you find out the mustering point for such miscreants is the legendary Duckie night at the Royal Vauxhall? Well, you can be sure it’s going to go OFF. Expect the off-the-wall performances, a Britpop-to-Britney soundtrack and plenty of sights you just can’t unsee.
6 Jul; £15
Gay Shame, Royal Vauxhall, 372 Kennington Lane, Vauxhall, SE11 5HY
THE ONE WITH A SPICE GIRL: Sink the Pink Icons Ball
We'll tell you what you want, what you really, really want… And that's to get down like a diva with legendary LGBTQ+ party crew Sink the Pink. Their huge Pride ball at Troxy means business: no messing around with any old stars, this is strictly icons only. That means tunes, moves and outfits inspired by the likes of Madonna, Streisand, Mariah, Gaga, Britney, Pat Butcher (for the brave) and... wait for it... a hit-packed performance from Mel C! Oh yes. So come on, get slamming to the left if you're having a good time, shaking to the right if you know that you feel fine... etc etc etc.
6 Jul; £31.50
Sink the Pink Icons Ball, Troxy, 490 Commercial Road, E1 0HX
THE HUGE ONE: Little Gay Brother's Queer Carnival
The challenge, should you choose to accept it, is to cram as many fierce lewks and even fiercer dance moves into one into one day as humanly possible. And here to help with your endeavours is LGBTQIA+ club collective Little Gay Brother, who are taking over Flat Iron Square for eight hours of glam performances, live music, dance shows, food and fabulous cocktails. Too easy, you say? Then your next challenge, and you really should choose to accept it, is to roll on to the after-party at Omeara next door, for yet more tantalising treats until 5am. Uh-huh: that's a 13-hour session. We know you're up to it.
6 Jul; from £20.90
Little Gay Brother's Queer Carnival, Flat Iron Square and Omeara, 64 Southwark Street, SE1 9EJ
THE PREP AND POST-PARTY: The LaLiT London
A serious party on the scale of Pride can’t be undertaken lightly, you know. As any long-distance reveller will tell you, it’s essential to warm up and cool down properly. You might pull something otherwise. With that training advice firmly in mind, we suggest you head directly to Baluchi at The LaLiT London in London Bridge this Friday, for its marvellously alliterative limber-up event: Drag, Dining and Debauchery. A four-course pan-Indian menu, 90 minutes of free-flowing prosecco and drag performances by Amanda Lepore, Hungry and Virgin Xtravaganzah will get you bang in the mood for the weekend ahead. And post-event? Well, how does an eight-course Pride Hangover Brunch, featuring slow-braised pork belly with honey and chilli glaze and yet more bottomless prosecco, sound? Yeah, thought so.
5 and 7 Jul; from £60 for Drag, Dining and Debauchery, £40 for Hangover Brunch
Baluchi, The LaLiT London, 181 Tooley Street, SE1 2JR
THE AQUATIC ONE: Nine Lives’ Mermaid Street Party
Mermaids, it could be argued, are the kweens of the ocean – being, as they are, essentially fish in drag. And downright fabulous with it. So there’s no better theme for a Pride street party, at the good folks at Nine Lives have correctly concluded. On Saturday their outlandish oceanic bash involves a deep-sea drag queen beauty pageant, vodka slushies and spritzers, killer DJs, bubble machines, paddling pools AAAAND… a lip-sync battle. Ariel-alikes busting out their best ‘Vogue’s? Shell yeah!
6 Jul; free
Nine Lives, 8 Holyrood Street, SE1 2EL
AND TO ROUND IT OFF LIKE A QUEEN: Ruinart Hotel 1729
Want a classier approach to Pride recovery? Then stay in a one-bedroom champagne hotel, daaahling. That’s right, such a thing does exist! And it exists right here, in Notting Hill. It’s the fine idea of champagne brand Ruinart, who promise guests at the hotel will ‘be inspired, dine and dream’. Which we well believe, because – knowing that the concept is by Jonathan Anderson (yep: THE Jonathan Anderson), the host is Ruinart Maître d’Hospitalité Olivier Livoir, and the food is by Luke Selby, who has worked under Ollie Dabbous at HIDE – we agree it’s the stuff of fantasy indeed. Book now for an experience that, we are further told, is ‘extraordinary and mesmeric’. And, we would further guess, involves rather a lot of champagne.
Until 14 Jul; £1,200 for overnight stay for two including BMW chauffeur transfers, dinner, breakfast and a selection of Ruinart Cuvées
Hotel 1729, Notting Hill
THE COOL CRASH PAD: The Nadler Soho
If you need a more wallet -friendly bed for the night, The Nadler Soho is just a short sashay down the road from the Pride Parade starting point (Portland Place, 12 noon), and has 78 stylish rooms, with mini kitchens, and breakfast delivered to your bed from Scarlett Green (smashed avocado, celeriac toast…). On Parade Day, fortify yourself with a complimentary Rainbow Highball (Hendrick’s Midsummer Solstice gin, passionfruit, charred pineapple, and sparkling water) to the sounds of the special Pride playlist - and I am sure you can guess what that will be: Cher, Britney Spears, Madonna and Lady Gaga? Yes, yes, yes and yes. And if you have any energy left, the in-house 'Local Ambassadors' (aka concierges) can hook you up with the best bars, spas and parties in town. You have been warned.
The Nadler Soho, 10 Carlisle St, Soho, London W1D 3BR
Pride weekend doubles from £300, room only
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